Pajiba gives us this kind of awesome video, featuring a young lady named Chunky Pam singing--nay, rapping--about the joys of Jersey. Somehow both Toms River and Parsippany are mentioned, but Moorestown isn't. Thats whack. Wiggedy whack. Yo.
Also, I take Reihan in a rap-battle. Or pose-down. Or whatever they call it.
I have never felt so sorry for you in my life.
ReplyDeleteSucks to be you!
ReplyDeleteI think you might be happier ... somewhere ... else.
ReplyDeleteI can't believe we lost to ... that.
ReplyDeleteDoin' me proud, Hommie Slice!!! ;-)
ReplyDeleteI knew a guy once whose brother worked at the CIA. Apparently there was pretty good intel that the Soviets never targeted any nukes at Jersey. The thinking being, well, no need to improve the place.
ReplyDeleteSomebody shoot me.
ReplyDeleteDamn, these comments are so sad. I watched this and actually missed my home state for the first time since leaving it two years ago! ANd no, I never had a goomah, hated the shore, and am glad to be outta there. But that video is a real walk down memory lane and captures the Jersey attitude. So fuck all y'all who look down on the Garden State!
ReplyDelete"Chunky Pam" ? Damn !
ReplyDeleteYou know? Suddenly I don't feel so bad about it.
ReplyDeleteYou know what would look sharp? A flag with 49 stars. Very slimming, very elegant.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, Jersey, how about a rematch? Just me and you, mano a mano.
ReplyDeleteOne notes in passing that GW is not racing to the defense of Jersey and all that it stands for. Interesting.
ReplyDeleteOh great. Just another instance of the Bos-Wash Axis of Elitism. What, Jersey is now supposedly America's greatest shithole? Really? Really?
ReplyDeleteHey Last--has your sweet little mid-Atlantic ass ever been to Gary, Indiana? Ever been to East St. Louis? What about Detroit?
We patriotic middle Americans will not be ignored! Our voices will be heard!!! WE MAY NOT HAVE A MET OR A GETTY BUT WE HAVE ALL OF THE NATION'S TRULY ABOMINABLE CITIES!!! SUCK ON THAT, GARDEN STATE!!!
Actually, uhm, thanks. Very decent of you, and all, what with the wars and the genocide and whatnot. But really, we were thinking of someplace in Oklahoma, maybe? I mean, somewhere a little nicer, that would be great.
ReplyDeleteWhew! All I can say is, Dodged a bullet there.
ReplyDeleteBy the way? Thanks a ton, King Charles II. Thanks a bloody ton, you fat syphilitic wanker.
ReplyDeleteI regret to acknowledge it, but in my long and distinguished public life, I disparaged my beloved home state of New Jersey on two non-consecutive occasions.
ReplyDeleteIn consideration of its artistic merit, and in gratitude for promoting the people and values of the great state of New Jersey, I hereby declare and decree "Drrrty Jerzy" the state anthem.
ReplyDeleteOn a side note, I'd totally hit that.